My big boy

Well, my little baby boy is growing more and more into the little toddler I was picturing he'd be sometime this summer. We have had quite a few milestones in the past few weeks, for he and I both.

Steven is crawling everywhere now and quite fast, too. He seems to have completely forgotten his army crawling ways (which now I kind of miss). In the last week he has been pulling himself to stand and has been pretty sturdy about it from the start. He even reaches on tip toes to play our piano (must get this on camera). In the last few days he has started inching along furniture, and just yesterday he walked along the entire length of our couch to get me. With how fast this is all happening, I wouldn't be surprised if he is walking very soon.

The biggest milestone, for the both of us, was that Steven is now weaned! I was thinking it would be a much more drawn out process then it has been. I've been so uncomfortable nursing (physically) since becoming pregnant, that I just couldn't do it any longer. Once I cut out night feedings on his birthday, I realized how little he really needed to nurse. He was only nursing at naps and before bedtime. I started taking out the nursing here and there for naps last week, going all day on Saturday and Sunday this past weekend with no nursing at nap time. Sunday and Monday night Nathan was my hero and put Steven to bed for me. I haven't nursed Steven since Saturday night!

When I realized it was over I was quite emotional. I thought of the struggle it had been to nurse at the beginning. I thought of my goal of wanting to make it at least a year when it looked so bleak in the beginning (and we surpassed the goal!). I thought of all the happy times where we would both be drifting to sleep as he was contented at my breast. The special bonding and closeness that kept him my "baby" for so long.

Now I get to experience something all new. Before the source of comfort was mommy's milk. Now it is mommy cuddles. I had always thought that Steven wasn't a very cuddly boy, at least with me, but now I realize that is because I had something else that could make him feel better. Now when he bumps his head, falls down, or gets drowsy, he will crawl into my lap and cuddle on my shoulder. Instead of nursing to sleep, naps and bedtime routines consist of us reading together and then me rocking and singing him to slumber. Now instead of watching his sweet face as he nurses, I get to rest my head on his and smell his sweet hair and feel his warm breath on my cheek. This has helped to heal the dull ache I had at first, missing my little baby. Now I am excited seeing him become a tumbly little boy.

I guess this marks my first experience with the continuous stages of my children's lives. It is sad to walk from one stage into another, but the excitement about what the next stage will bring eases the transition. Knowing I get to begin stage one all over again in August with a new little bundle to love is even better!

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